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The Observe and Rapport Newsletter
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A weekly guide of my favorite books, articles, products, and lifestyle habits.
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April 26th, 2024 | by Kyle Brennan
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Thought of the Week
I only have one preference:
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I prefer that it be the way it is.
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I've been repeating this quote to myself repeatedly as a reminder to stop trying to control every situation I'm in. So often, we wish circumstances were different.
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- When it's raining, we think "Why did it have to rain today?"
- When we rush to our next meeting and someone stops to chat, we think "Hurry up, I gotta go!"
We want conditions to be ideal, but life rarely provides us with a perfectly manicured path.
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I recently read The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer (full review below). In it, he writes, “Acceptance means events can make it through you without resistance.”
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When we stop resisting the circumstances life it presenting to us, there is only interaction with what is in front of you.
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"I prefer that it be the way it is."
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What I'm Reading
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Wow, this might be one of the best books I’ve read all year and one that significantly altered my worldview.
Infidel is Ayaan Hirsi Ali’s @ayaanhirsiali autobiography depicting her childhood amidst repressive Islamic bigotry and enslavement of the spirit in Somalia, Kenya, Ethiopia, and Saudi Arabia. She recounts the horrors of genital mutilation in Somalia, the racial prejudice in Saudi Arabia against non-Arabs (especially Africans), the complete hatred and Nazi-like brainwashing she witnessed in Saudi Arabia against the Jews (which takes place in most of the Islamic world, and the submission of women in the cult-like Islamic culture that preaches shame, victimization, and dogmatism. Ayaan shockingly reveals the horrific fate of rape victims in Islam who are blamed for being raped and murdered or tortured.
The author takes us on her mind-expanding journey realizing that all of the things she was taught as fact, we in actuality, fanaticism. She recounts discovering Western novels and reading for the first time about sexual freedom, equality between boys and girls, and the fantasies of a guilt-free life.
When her father sells her off into a marriage with a man she wants no part of, Ayaan flees to Holland as a refugee, where she sees that the Western world she was taught was full of prostitutes and demons, was actually the most free and safe environment she had ever seen.
In Holland, she consumes the values of democracy, freedom of expression, and equal rights among men, women, races, and every religious denomination. Eventually, she became a member of parliament for the Dutch Liberal Party a defender of human rights, and an opponent of Islamic fanaticism. As a result, she became a victim of death threats and had to live in hiding. Vilified by both Islamists and their leftist backers, who hypocritically claim to be pro-feminism and human rights but attack those who highlight abuses in Islam.
Let us support people like this who aren’t afraid to speak the truth against tyranny.
Rating: 5 / 5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
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The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer was one of the best books I’ve read in the last five years. The Surrender Experiment is Singer’s personal journey of becoming unattached. The Untethered Soul defined the “inner” dynamics, understanding the internal, Surrender Experiment, puts that internal knowledge into practice with the outer world, life.
In this book, Singer provides a road map to a new way of living not in the moment, but to exist in a state of perpetual happiness.
Similar to the concept of the movie Yes Man, It’s Singer’s story of awakening and then making a promise to himself to let life take the lead and not listen to and follow the voice in his head. It’s filled with example after example of surrendering to life and being amazed at what unfolds.
“My formula for success was very simple: Do whatever is put in front of you with all your heart and soul without regard for personal results. Do the work as though it were given to you by the universe itself—because it was.”
This book, just like the other two I’m familiar with, is thought-provoking and forces you to re-think our approach to life’s obstacles.
What if we stopped resisting life and just let it happen? What if we just let things go when they didn’t happen the way we want? What if we sought for peace in all situations we find ourselves and did not let our inner voice dictate our feelings?
The only reason I’m giving it a lower review is because the second half of the book is filled with story after story of Michael’s software business and the legal battles they faced, which got boring quickly. I wish he stuck to the message of the book vs. spending multiple chapters on a software company.
Rating: 3.8 / 5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️
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Article I'm Reading
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Jonathan Haidt recently came out with a new book titled The Anxious Generation, which highlights the epidemic of teen mental illness. He proposes four rules to help end the mental illness epidemic and restore a more humane childhood:
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- No phones in school
- No smartphones until age 14
- No social media until age 16
- Give kids back some free play, independence, and responsibility in the real world
In this article, however, Jonathan's colleague, Greg Lukianoff argues that while this approach is a good start, having the government apply these rules would be a slippery slope towards limiting children's first amendment rights - which we often forget, apply to minors just as much as adults - although in different capacities.
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Site I'm Using
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Loved a book and want to find similar recommendations? Type in a book, series or topic you enjoyed to see recommendations on what to read next.
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Powerful Visualization on Time
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We perceive time relative to the "absolute" time we can compare it to.
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By the end of your first year alive as a baby, a week is just a fiftieth of your life.
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By the time you turn 50, a whole year will be a fiftieth of your life
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The visualization in this article really changes our perception of time and how it changes as we grow older.
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Quote I'm Pondering
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“Nothing is clearer in history than the adoption by successful rebels of the methods they were accustomed to condemn in the forces they deposed.”
— Will and Ariel Durant
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Keith and Kyle sit down to discuss the knowledge gained from 20 episodes of podcasting, Ayaan Hirsi Ali’s incredible journey discussed in her memoir “Infidel”, Michael Singers' experience in being completely open to opportunities in his book “The Surrender Experiment”, The profundity hidden beneath the surface of Disney/Pixar movies, and how annoying it is when people are late.
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Books discussed in this episode:
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Check Out My Amazon Favorites Bookstore
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Browse my favorite book selections hand-curated by me. I also earn commissions so if you buy anything, those earnings get reinvested right back into this fancy newsletter ;)
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Kyle's Published Work
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33 Life Lessons on My 33rd Birthday
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Thirty-three was a big one. Mostly because I became a dad. Our daughter was born on New Year’s Eve — a fitting arrival for a kid destined to reset everything. It’s been a beautiful, if slightly sleep-deprived blur ever since. I’ve only been “Dad” for less than ten months, but if I’m being honest, I’ve been preparing for the role for over …
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Depth Over Downloads: Why Spending Time with Books Still Matters
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Everyone wants faster information. But no one asks if faster information leads to better understanding — or a better life. In the age of AI and tweet-sized wisdom, we’ve confused information with transformation. But there’s a massive difference between knowing what a book says and being changed by it. The Delusion of Instant Learning In a recent interview, political journalist Ezra Klein admitted he once believed …
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The Jack Reacher Approach to Never Being Caught Off Guard
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There’s no difference between a pessimist who says, ‘Oh, it’s hopeless, so don’t bother doing anything,’ and an optimist who says, ‘Don’t bother doing anything, it’s going to turn out fine anyway.’ Either way, nothing happens.” —Yvon Chouinard, Founder of Patagonia I don’t read much fiction, but I’ve always been hooked on Lee Child’s Jack Reacher. He’s not your typical …
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